I had an interesting dream a couple of weeks ago. Like most of my dreams, I am in an observer position, like I am watchi
ng a movie. In this dream, I was overhearing one person explain to another the essence of how to have a happy life. The essential point he was making was that to be happy, we have to live from inside our natural flow. That concept was new to the listener, so the fellow went on to explain.
“Each person is born with certain innate skills. We are all different from each other and each of us has our own distinct nat
ural flow. This is why so many people are so unhappy. They are trying to be like someone they believe is successful or happy. But we can’t live someone else’s life because we are not them. Their flow is different from ours and thus their life would not actually make us happy. Happiness does not come from the things in our life, it comes from us fully living and expressing our natural flow.”
Now this dream was at 1:30 in the morning. While I might remember the feeling of a dream from the middle of the
night, I don’t generally remember any specific content. This time, however, the two words ‘natural flow’ kept repeating in my head until morning to help me remember this dream. The principle revealed has been rolling around in my head since gathering perspective. The more I look at it the more I see how deeply we have been brainwashed into believing certain images of what success and happiness should look like. Cleverly, these images are not complete lies because they reflect what happiness looks like for a small percentage of folks. The other 98% of us get mesmerized by the twinkling lights and buy into the belief that the only reason we are not happy all the time is because we are missing some part of these objects and situations in our lives.
Billions of dollars are spent every year inundating us with visions of how wonderful our lives would be if only 
we had ____ . This is the world of advertising. Its primary job is to get us to ignore that little voice in our hearts that guides us and tells us what will make us truly happy. Real happiness is an inside-out process. It comes from us learning who we are and how to express in a way that is supported by others. Learning how to express our natural talents and flow in a way that others find valuable generates self-esteem. When carefully cultured, this turns into self-love. This is the core of happiness – self-love.
When I talk about this idea with many folks, they usually tell me they have no natural talent. Unfortunately, we have bee
n mislead into believing that talent is something only the gifted few have, like artists or musicians. This misperception comes from an overly narrow definition of talent. That is why I include the word flow. I speak with many mothers who feel they have no talent, and then I explain that motherhood is one of the greatest talents. Being a good mother is a totally awesome talent. Listening to another human being without having to jump in and demand they pay attention to you is another awesome talent. Being able to barter and negotiate at your local farmer’s market is a talent (one which I wish I had, but don’t.) The attention to detail necessary to organize or clean is a valuable talent. Having a good sense of taste for what flavors work together is a chef-level skill set. Talent is everywhere. If something you encounter is working well, there is probably somebody with a talent for that something making it work.
I had a patient ask me last week if I had any cures for ADHD. I explained that I did not have any cures because ADHD is not an illness. ADHD is a normal genetic variant Mother Nature c
reated to ensure the survival of the human species. Folks with ADHD have minds that naturally pay attention to peripheral events and objects. For example, in a classroom, an ADHD child will pay no attention to the teacher and the subject being taught, but when questioned, they can tell you in detail about all the posters on the wall and what everyone around them was doing. My patient identified strongly with this experience. The reason this is vital for human survival is that these folks are the ones who serve as the lookout guards and scouts for the tribe. They see threats coming long before anybody else and they are able to warn the tribe of pending trouble. This is an example of an inborn talent that our linear approach to learning has judged as wrong or bad. Yet put these people in the right environment, like the military or police, and they excel. More than that, doing what they are designed to do makes them happy. They are functioning in their natural flow, doing what life designed them to do.
This is a good example of what the person in my dream was talking about. Doing what you are naturally good at, 
and developing the skills to do it really well is what will make you happy. Happy is not about having fast cars or a hot mate. Happy is about being in your flow. You amplify this by sharing your natural flow in a way that serves other people. When you do this, you get support for your sharing because it does for others something they need but may not have the flow to do themselves. Mechanically inclined people can be of great service through carpentry, plumbing, or auto repair. Most people do not have these skills and greatly value someone who does. An example of an innate talent is someone with a mechanical mind who can visualize things in 3D space and move that picture around. Some people can do this and most others can not. You then apply that inborn talent to learning a particular skill or trade for which that talent is suited.
I have seen this over and over. Get a person lined up with doing something they have a natural talent for and they l
ove what they are doing. On the flip side, put someone with no natural talent into an arena where they need that talent and the job becomes torture and frustration. For example, I have terrible hand speed and positioning such that I can not type. I spent a year taking a typing class and was no better after a year than when I started. I type these newsletters with two fingers on each hand while looking at my fingers the whole time. I am equally terrible at foreign languages. My sister has an ear for languages and loves teaching English via Zoom to students all over the world. I have taken four years of Spanish and still can’t understand anything someone says in Spanish, much less say anything intelligible. These are not my flow.
You might be good with animals, or good with plants, or good with numbers, or good with fabrics. The list goes on f
orever. As I say, talents are everywhere. Find yours and cultivate it. Develop skills in your talent so that people will support you in expressing your talent and joy. This is the road to happiness. Your talent might be in supporting the feelings of others, or in building their confidence. These are highly valued talents that work well in forming lasting relationships. These require sensitivity and positivity. Most people lack these talents.
I hope to paint a picture of just how diverse talents can be. Each talent involves specific brain functions. Every perso
n’s brain is different from every other person’s. Some of this is genetics, some are epigenetics, some occur while receiving nutrition and stimulus in the womb, while others are microbiome mediated. All this is in place shortly after you are born. How the 172 billion nerve cells in our brains are wired creates a lot of opportunity for unique expression. The sad thing is that we have all these nerve cells at birth, and we spend the rest of our life shutting them down one by one. Growing up is mostly the process of inhibiting nerve pathways. Very little is about forming new pathways. That is why we love looking at the smiles of tiny babies. They glow with so much potential because they have not shut anything down yet.
Happiness is functioning with your brain flowing wit
hout inhibition by expressing your natural flows in ways that support your life. These pathways become enhanced, and that enhancement feels like happiness!
Take care,
David
Ellen
Here we are at the doctors office again. Months ago Elle
n did a sleep study to see if she had apnea. Her blood tests suggested this possibility. Well we finally got the results of the study and no sleep issues were found. That is nice. That means no Cpap and all the issues that seems to create. Yeah!
Omega 3 slows aging 10 to 12%
Omega 3 oil is good for a lot of things, but new research is showing that is actually slows down the aging process. My favorite omega 3 oil is krill oil because it is in a form that does not go rancid. That also means no fish burps when taking it.
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“Openness is essential for growth. Without openness to what is we learn nothing. Growth is a constant incorporation of non-self into self.“
~David DeLapp
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Head trauma may activate dormant virus in brain
Head traumas are well known for causing long term brain issues like post concussion syndrome, and even lead to Parkinson’s disease.
New research is showing that the trauma may activate a sleeping virus called HSV-1 triggering the resultant damage.
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“Diversity is essential to building strength. Diversity provides flexibility. Strength without flexibility is brittle and therefore fragile. “
~David DeLapp
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Bone Gel for osteoporosis
Research is being done with an injectable bone gel made from hyaluronic acid and the type of calcium found in livi
ng bone. While typical osteoporosis drugs take up to a year to have any effect, this bone gel makes the bones stronger in just weeks. Human trials are coming up soon.
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“The principle of tolerance and patience. Have your opinions, feelings, and beliefs, but allow all others to have their opinions, feelings, and beliefs.“
~David DeLapp